Here I am, sleeping on strangers beds, closer to their intimacy… how long this should last? Is this part of the process of reaching my goals?
She does not have any furniture and I am on the carpet eating my breakfast, on a floor where autumn has left some footprints. Lately, on weekends I’m living in someone else’s that gives me a roof to stay and a warm bed to sleep. He does not know what I am doing, and he is not asking either. Why? Should I tell him where do I sleep when others are in my home?
Life have shown me greys and yellows, reds and blacks, but here I am, still standing and not planning on leaving this dream to slip out of my hands. I know that when I get to where I want to be, I will finally breathe with open lungs.
My coffee is cold now, feeling a little bit out of place, everybody seems so young and my age is hidden by my night cream. I wish I had this when I was in my early 20’s but life decided that it was not my time… maybe it is now.
Am I over thinking? Am I getting crazy? Do you feel the same when you got out of the bubble and hit the reality of the diaspora?
I talked to one of my dearest friends that is now living in Colombia… she used the perfect word to describe our emotions, “opportunity”. That is what we want, what we need, one chance, an opportunity to show who we are.
Sometimes I wonder, are we going to be truly happy living away from that place known as home?